I am feeling less overwhelmed which just goes to show that blogging it out is a very powerful thing to do.
The sun shone today but I had already cheered up considerably.
I can’t control the future and my children will make their own choices increasingly. My most successful sibling had only one O-Level to his name. I have a Cambridge law degree and have struggled to find the right work for a long time. There are no guarantees of a fine education leading you to brilliant things or of a terrible one meaning you will never succeed. I am blessed with children who are healthy, intelligent, sensitive and brave.
My worries about my 17 year old eased when he came downstairs the other day announcing that he will relax until the Spring and then hopes to do something constructive probably education wise.
My 13 year old has my type of focus and has amazing research skills as well as her creative talents. She will be OK and if she is not, I will be here for her.
I have spoken to my 12 year old about possibly returning to school later this year. He veers between considering it and ruling it out but there is no mad rush.
Our home education happens every single day in one way or another and we will return to more structured learning like the rest of the world next week.
I tapped into some expat groups and one in particular has helped me loads with practical information. I have also had the details of a woman who can sort you out on a paid basis if you get really stuck.
I don’t want to return to the UK and I was lucky enough to come across a blog post recently by a Dad who sees little hope for young people in the UK. It does not mean he is right but it did remind me why I jumped on that ferry more than six months ago now.
My friend told me she could absolutely see me on a motorbike so perhaps that will happen before the end of this year. Or perhaps not but at least I am not standing still in life as so many do.
On the marriage front, people fed back that my husband is not so different to other men. He is away this weekend and I missed him even before he set out as daft as that sounds. I reflect that I have two photos or have had anyway of blokes next to me looking like the cat that got the cream. They both stuck around for about 3 years total. At least the husband has staying power and I am by no means perfect. I am intelligent and I think that can bring its own challenges for partners. It must get a bit wearing to live with someone who is continually questioning, challenging and analysing just about everything.
So let’s readdress what I said the other day. I am brilliant at work. I work hard and I do well. I have awards from blogging networks and Cosmopolitan Magazine. I try my best as a parent, am very much on their side and love them to bits. I keep them safe from harm and I don’t tell them lies so they know they can trust me.
I am not too old for romance but perhaps I need to look for it a little closer to home and do my bit on that front too. The future will work that one out.
You could say I have had a word with myself.