My new French lover

Admit it! Who clicked in a super-speedy fashion?

Right, as you will now know we have a found a very welcoming bar here. Madame has a very tiny dog who ignored me for months and then after a biscuit or two goes insanely wild every time I go in. This pleases Madame no end and if the dog does not come to me she will plonk it on my knee or table.

This led Princess a young woman who frequents the bar and who feels she has perfect English to ask “Have you spent time with your lover recently?” meaning the dog. It says an awful lot that my Other Half did not even flinch or look shocked. I think he just assumes I could never take a lover or quite possibly attract one either.

Anyway, so it appears I have a four-legged French lover.

The other morning, I got up way too early and headed for the bar with my husband after shopping. I was feeling really tired and not quite with it. At which point Madame from behind the bar kept calling my name and saying “Piss! Piss!” It became clear that she wanted me to take the dog out to pee. I tried to avoid it altogether and then told my husband he could take it but nope, Madame insisted she would only let me take her dog out.

Apparently the dog it to be taken down the side of the church to its favourite peeing spot!

So there you have it, my husband is perceived as a lawyer, rock star and chef and I am just about good enough to take the dog out.

I hoped this was a one-off but on the next visit, Madame placed the dog in my arms as soon as I arrived with the “Piss” instruction. As I ambled along the pavement, my husband said “Are you alright?” and of course as Madame was in earshot and is vaguely terrifying I said “Ah oui”

I guess this is what you call real integration into a community?

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